Our kids can say the craziest things. In fact kids can be so honest, sometimes it hurts, but I think we can all learn by the openness and authenticity our kids show. They usually are not battle scarred like us adults, not fearful of offending or losing relationships, they notice and they speak. It is wonderful!
In fact, because I live eat and breath Communication DNA and how it influences our daily lives I want to share with you how we can link what our kids say and do to the Communication DNA styles. Building an Understanding and appreciation of our children, their strengths and challenges will only build better connections for us as parents. Let's face it, we need all the help we can get hey?
The following are four explanations of how our children innocently reveal their Communication DNA:
The Powerful child: as a child this was my strongest style. I also have a niece who is a very Powerful Communicator. She was born screaming and letting the world know she was hear to stay and she would tell you what she thought. My niece was always in control. She would not be told what to do, what to wear even at the age of 3! As a Powerful child, that child rules the house…and probably will for years to come. As a parent it is a game of leading them without them knowing you are leading them. These kids need freedom in decision making and like to feel in control. As a parent we need to give them safe parameters to do this until they are old enough to fly solo. Teaching them that they can come across very strongly will help them build healthier friendships.
The Playful child: If you are blessed to have a playful child then you will be entertained for years to come! These are the performers, the story tellers. They love to be the centre of attentions and are highly optimistic. They can get into trouble in environments like school if they perform too much and disrupt the class room with their antics. As a parent it is a fine balance of allowing them to be themselves while learning to curtail this need for being the centre of attention. These kids will always have many friends and be a delight to be around. Teaching them how to follow through and increase their organisation will help them with school.
The Patient child: These children are quiet, observant tend to be introverted and are highly emotionally sensitive. They may struggle with change and need time and support to face change. My son is a Patient child and has been such a gift to our family. He won’t speak up much, he is so supportive of others, he feels what others feel and is a loyal friend. These children are usually followers and are the complete opposite to the Powerful child, who can come off as quite bossy. The Patient child needs to know that they have a quiet strength and ability to really tune into the needs of others; a gift that can come at a price, as empathy can be emotionally taxing. Teaching the Patient child self-care and to speak up is essential for them look after themselves.
The Perfectionist child: The Perfectionist child is highly organized, planned and likes to know “why?” Also usually introverts they can function based on systems and patterns. They like rules and follow them to the law. Being perfectionists can raise their levels of anxiety and they tend to be over thinkers. They will be highly detailed and organised. This DNA style is the complete opposite of the Playful child. Teaching your Perfectionist child to be aware of their very high expectations and natural ability to be “pessimistic” will help them find the balance.
We all reveal our own Communication DNA in the things we say and do. So, the next time someone says something that surprises or delights you, pay attention to whether or not they just offered a glimpse into who they are.
If you would like to learn more about Communication DNA you can read more about all of the styles.
Learn more about the Powerful
Learn more about the Playful
Learn more about the Patient
Learn more about the Perfectionist
If you would like to learn what your communication DNA, you can check out my online courses here.
Until next time, Care, Connect and be a Courageous Communicator.
Let's improve our world one conversation at a time.